Sometimes I sit down and start writing and I have zero thoughts in my head, and I don’t know what’s going to come out because it’s all intuition. It’s hard to write about music. Sometimes there’s concrete things to say or stories to tell, but a lot of times what comes up is a lot of incoherent feelings and recollections. That’s when it’s easy to start rambling or get too personal. Especially when it’s love songs we’re dealing with. Especially longing sad ones that cut to the bone. And especially if it’s an artist I was attached to in a particular moment in my life. Like Lucinda Williams, who I discovered and became slightly obsessed with at a pretty crucial junction. That was when I was first living on my own and needless to say there was a bad romance. 90% imaginary, but a romance nonetheless. Now I realize that it was a dumb mistake (not the dumbest mistake I’ve ever made, but pretty dumb) and not worth the energy I put into it, and it’s not something I think about or try to remember very often. In fact, it only ever pops up on my radar when I listen to certain music. Like Lucinda Williams. She makes me remember how I was feeling. For a while I found it irritating and I avoided listening to her music. Now it doesn’t bother me anymore and I’ve started to really enjoy her again. Because she writes so much about her own rocky love life, it’s impossible not make a strong emotional connection to her music and start relating it back to your life. And when you’re young and impressionable, those connections stay vivid for years. But after a while it doesn’t hurt anymore, and it becomes almost a pleasant nostalgia. You begin to smile at your own stupidity. I remember how much I felt this song when I first heard it (it’s one of her less depressing numbers). There was someone I would’ve drove my car all night to go see, if I’d had the chance. Those feelings turned out to be misdirected and didn’t lead to anything good, but it would be nice just to get that excited again. I’d like to really feel this song again like I used to.